- you find -60 a mite chilly
- the trunk of your car doubles as a freezer
- you attended a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewels and your Sorrels.
- the kids think that you have to get on a airplane to go on vacation.
- driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow.
- at least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant.
- the most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
- the snowblower gets stuck on the roof
- a snowmachine is a snowmachine and not a snowmobile
- everyone plans their weddings around hunting season
- you know a honey bucket is really a bucket, but it's not really full of honey. (If you don't know, don't ask)
- you learned to swim indoors.
- you leave your Christmas lights up, year round, because as soon as it gets warm enough to take them down it starts getting dark enough to put them up again.
- your bedroom windows are covered with black trash bags
- you know the meaning of the word "baleen" and it has nothing to do with making hay into large cubes.
- You open your freezer to take out something for dinner, and are faced with many choices, Pink Salmon, Silver Salmon, Red Salmon, King Salmon, Smoked Salmon, or Halibut!
- You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is 3 feet above the ground.
- You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
- You can tell the difference between a chipmunk and a squirrel from 300 yards away.
- You refer to the 48 states as the "lower 48".
- You have to wait until 2am to light fireworks because that's the dimmest part of the day on July 4th. (or you wait to do fireworks till New Years and then do them right after breakfast=o)
- Your idea of formal, is a suit and bunny boots (large sealed Boots good to -60 F)
- "Vacation" means driving to Chitna to dip net.
- The last thing you do before going to bed is plugging in your vehicle.
- You see cars running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it
- You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, and Road Construction.
- Mosquito dope is part of your daily attire.
- the first aid/survival kit in your vehicle includes: flares, emergency blankets, candy bars, water, bug dope, duct tape (lots of it), 30.6 rifle shells, toilet paper, berry buckets.
- it's 20 above and everyone's wearing T-shirts, and Flip-Flops
- the State Troopers make a public announcement on the news telling people to make sure the kids Halloween costumes are big enough to fit over their snowsuits. (this happened just the other day=o)
- major culture shock sets in on your hour layover in the Seattle airport
- you know for sure that Alaska is the biggest state.
- your lipstick is......Blueberry juice!!
- at least one of your roofs is a blue tarp
- "turning the fan on in the bathroom" means removing the chinking from the outhouse walls.
Hope you enjoy it....it made me laugh just writing it=o)